Stunning

Quote from a story about the Sam Newman debacle - the story was written by a journalist as a reaction to the whole thing:

“There are lots of knockers in women’s footy but I don’t think he’s one of them.”

And that was a woman that said that. Awesome.

And now we cross live to another blog...

An old school friend and wine expert I know has started a blog on wine called Tannic Teeth.

The blog also touches on music and food and is rather interesting if you're into any ofn those three topics. Which most people are.

Check it out.

I am SO outta here...

Yesterday morning I went to a Chamber of Commerce breakfast.
After the breakfast I was offered the position of editor at Myaree for three of the company's mastheads.
By yesterday afternoon I'd found out I was starting next Tuesday, after the long weekend.

It's all hapened so fast - and I couldn't be happier.

So today, right here, right now, is the last day I will have to make the half hour trip down to the Rockingham office.
It's the last day I'll have to put up with my soon-to-be-former boss.
You, dear readers, have heard me whinge and moan about this place on a fairly constant basis.

I want to get one thing straight - it really hasn't been all bad.
I've made some great friends both in the office and in the wider community, I've had the opportunity to get to know an area that I otherwise would never have known about, and I've gained some invaluable experience from working in an office where a half-hearted effort was never good enough.

To be fair to my boss, she has been good to me overall. She fought for a pay rise on my behalf and she was the one that encouraged me to go for this new job.

But it's easy to look at things in a different light when you're moving on.

As for me, I can't wait. Working in an office that is so close to home, editing a paper that is delivered to my doorstep, and being given an opportunity to do a job of which I know I am capable. AND I get to work alongside Observer.

I'm very excited.
Oh, and did I mention it was my birthday tomorrow? :)

I won't be crying into my weetbix over this one

This just in - Australian Olympic hopeful Nick D'Arcy has pretty much had his last chance of swimming for Australia in Beijing denied.

Good.

I try not to be the vindictive type, but the time has come where we stop idolising our sports stars to the degree where they get off with little or no punishment for doing stupid things like abusing drugs or assaulting people.

Seriously, this guy D'Arcy - allegedly, he hasn't been convicted yet - punched a teammate of his so hard in the face that he busted the guy's mouth. He was charged with grievous bodily harm - this is not just common assault we're talking about, people.

The worst part was that he did it only hours after qualifying for the Olympics.

Now, I don't know about you, but if I had just qualified for the Olympics, I would be on such a natural high that there would be very little anyone would be able to say or do to make me want to throw a punch at them.

Suffer the consequences D'Arcy - maybe next time you won't resort to being such a thug.

I need to share something with you guys

I am sickeningly happy right now.

Like, happy how the male protagonist is at the end of some crappy romantic comedy where everything goes to shit but in the end everything is sorted out nicely.

Happy enough to evoke retching in most of the people I know that read this blog.

Apart from the fact that I am actually, finally getting on top of my finances for what is really the first time in my life, apart from the fact that I have some really promising job prospects on the horizon and apart from the fact that I have some of the most amazing friends ever.

Apart from all that I'm still giddy with happiness.

I've made some tough decisions about my life in the past few weeks and so far, they've all paid off.

I am so happy with where I'm at right now that I just needed to share that with my dear readers.

I hope some of this happiness brushes off onto you guys :)

Okay I'm done now. Thanks for listening.

Blah blah blah

I've written no less than four blog posts this morning and deleted each one of them.
The truth is, I don't have much to say today.

My birthday is coming up this weekend - which is always fun - and in other parts of my life I'm generally either happy or making changes where I'm not.

Working with my boss is finally starting to get a bit too much so I'm starting to consider my options elsewhere.

I'm reading a great little book called "Blood Sucking Fiends" which is a cool little comedy about a girl who wakes up in a dumpster as a vampire.

I went bowling on Friday and, for the record, I am bad. Really bad. Out of a possible 300 (perfect) score, I got a measly 58. Isn't that just awesome?

The Eagles won on the weekend - a rarity these days - so that makes for a pleasant little surprise.

And did I mention my birthday was coming up? :)

Facebook grammar terrorism

It's a frightening concept, isn't it?

You know those quizzes you do on Facebook? Well I got one sent to me the other day called "Stylish, Smart or Social?"
For the uninitiated, you answer a handful of questions based on your personality/lifestyle and they tell you whether you are, in this case, stylish, smart or social.

So I answer the questions and the following result is posted:

Your You

You are you and you may not be the smartist or the stylish or the most social but you have your own qualities and thats great!

Jesus...

Another week, another trophy

Last week Manchester United were crowned Kings of England.

This week they were crowned Kings of Europe.

To those WA footy fans out there, regardless of your team at the moment, I would strongly recommend diversifying in terms of your sporting interests.

The fact that the Eagles are so woeful at the moment is like water off a duck's back to me - because I've got United to follow too :)

You know what I love?

Being up at the crack of dawn.

Hear me out.

I love the fact that the air is crisp and clean. I love the fact that the sky is gradually yet noticeably getting lighter. I love the fact that the moon is still in the sky. I love the fact that people are darting backwards and forwards like ants, on their way to their respective homes or works. I love watching the streetlights slowly blink out, one by one, as the sky gets lighter. I love the fact that the whole day is ahead of you.

But most of all, I love the fact that a new day equates to a fresh start, a new beginning. Anything could happen.

Just a quick update

I'm listening to some music and reading a book I'm quite excited about at the moment -so I just thought I'd let you know.

The new Pendulum album - In Silico - is everything I'd hoped it would be and more.

Also, I received a new CD today from the lovely folk at Amphead Music by a band called Dirt River Radio. Apparently they're a blues-rock outfit, but it's the cracking title that got me, despite the fact that it sounds a bit country and western - Come back Romance, all is forgiven.

Reviews for both of those CDs will follow in the next week or two.

And finally, speaking of cracking titles, I'm reading a great little book loaned to my by a lovely work colleague of mine that was written by a guy named Paul Carter.
The title is Don't tell mum i work on the rigs, she thinks I'm a piano player in a whorehouse.
Gold.
I'm about halfway through, and basically it's a bit of an autobiographical tale about Carter's crazy experiences working on oil rigs around the world in dangerous and exotic locations.
I'm loving it - I read halfway though it the first time I opened it, and hoping to read the rest tonight :)

That will be all.

Oh. My. God.

Okay I've just returned from Dan's blog and I am so excited I can barely contain myself.

When I was younger there was one television show that I watched religiously. Week in, week out, I would tune into the supernatural adventures of Special Agent Fox Mulder and Special Agent Dana Scully.

That's right - The X-Files - and with the news that another X-Files movie is being released I'm having a lot of trouble containing myself :)

Get excited people - and visit Dan's blog to see the trailer.

Awesome.

I'm sorry, what?

You would think, wouldn't you, that being the host of a daily current affairs program on the national affairs broadcaster you would have a pretty good handle on your grammar?

I was listening to the ABC's PM program last night when a story about UFOs came on.

The host proceeded to pronounce UFO as a word, rather than three individual letters.

It came out sounding something like yufow.

Now that's paranormal.

Feel the love

There's nothing quite like a bit of an upheaval to really sort the wheat from the chaff in regards to your friends.
I'm going through a couple of major changes to my life at the moment, some of which have been doing my head in, but a few kind messages of support from friends goes a long way to making it all okay.
Thanks guys. You know who you are :)

Sabbath's Theatre

Some time ago, Observer blogged about a novel she had read called Sabbath's Theatre.

With my curiosity piqued, I decided to borrow the copy through the CNG Lending Library and give it a read.

I've never read any Philip Roth before. My dad told me that he was apparently banned in Australia in the 60s or 70s for writing a book about a guy who could not stop masturbating.
After reading Sabbath's Theatre, this sounds about right.

Basically, this was the most challenging book I have ever read. Many times I put it down when it was just too hard and too wordy to read, but about halfway through the book I clicked.

Roth, like the absolutely reprehensible protagonist in the book, Mickey Sabbath, was challenging me to put the book down. He wanted me to say it was too hard and give up. So I persevered.

And in the end, it was ultimately a rewarding read. Sabbath is such an unlikeable character - everything he says or does throughout the book is intended to cause pain to the people around him.
He is a twisted old man with an obsession for sex and goes to the point of shutting out or offending pretty much everyone in his life that ever cared about him.

Roth uses the nice little stylistic trick of switching from first to third person about half way through the book, pretty much at the point in which you realise Sabvbath is slowly losing his mind.

*WARNING: spoiler ahead*

In the end though, he ends up with nothing, and while I was expecting a slightly more spectacular ending, in hindsight I thought it was pretty appropriate considering his escapades over the course of the novel.

My car hates me right now

My car and I have been through a few rough patches over the turbulent three years we've known each other.

I almost wrote it off once - but no, I had comprehensive insurance and, surprisingly, the insurance company decided to fix the car rather than junk it.

Since its resurrection some two and a half years ago, I have added a myriad of scratches, nicks, paint marks and small dents to various sections of the car body.

Then, on Monday, one of my friends reversed into my car. The worst part was I was standing there watching it happen.

I called out my friend's name once, twice, three times, then on the fourth I heard the bang.

It's such a sickening sound, isn't it?

Metal on metal, car versus car.

To my friend's credit they are in the process of organising it to be fixed and I know they feel terrible about the whole situations.

I've managed to pry open the driver's side door just enough so I can get in the car without climbing across the passenger seat.

And still, the old girl dutifully starts every day and takes me to and from work.

More loyal than a dog, I say.

Touch wood.

Soccer mad

Following a readership survey of this blog, I have calculated that roughly less than 3 per cent of my readership will care about the following blog entry.

But I don't care.

Because, you see, Manchester United have gone to the top again, winning back to back English Premier League titles in style.

That's all. I won't bore you with the details.

I'll be handing down my budget mid-week

Today is my first day as acting editor while my fearless leader is away on a self-funded jaunt.

To celebrate, I'm bringing in a raft of changes that will be applicable in the office from today.

• Triple J is the only station permitted to be played during work hours.
• All staff shall address me as Sir David.
• I will start at 11am and finish at 3pm every day. Other staff will pick up the slack during the hours I am not here.
• Certain members of staff will be charged an idiot tax - how much that tax is and when it is charged will depend on the circumstances and the level of idiocy shown. In the interests of fairness and equality, I myself am not immune from such a tax.

I'm also announcing a major reshuffle of office duties. In a bid to create a better understanding between staff members about their own separate roles, I have decided that, for the next week, sales staff shall write editorial for the paper. Journalists will be put in charge of distribution and sales assistants who man the front desk will become advertising representatives. Distribution staff will be out the front in a bid to make them a little more customer focused.

Heck, if it doesn't work, we'll just change back on Monday week when the boss returns.

Faker - Be The Twilight

Okay, so this isn't exactly a new album - it came out in February - but I've had trouble taking it out of my CD player long enough to do the review on it since I bought it.

I should put this review in a bit of context - I loved Faker's first album Addicted Romantic. It was dark and broody yet packed full of power pop rock.

So Be The Twilight was pretty much a perfect follow up.

Kicking off with the hit single This Heart Attack, the CD is pretty much the perfect Aussie pop rock album.

Are You Magnetic?, the band's latest charts offering, is a great little ditty about life and it's intricacies: "Are you magnetic?/Do you land in the right place?"

However, it's after the first two singles that the album really shines.

Killer on the Loose is laden with groovy bass and drums while the soaring melodic guitar riffs round out the track.

In general, the album shows a more mature Faker (great rock and roll cliche number one).

The Robert Smith-style twang of the lead singer's voice has been reduced a little in this latest offering - which can't be a bad thing.

There's even a slower, ballad-style song reminiscent of Crowded House (Kid, Pleas Try Harder).

But by far the standout track on the album is Dumb Mistakes - a brilliant narative on the - you guessed it - dumb mistakes we all make when falling for one another: "If we joke and we continue to talk like this/I'm scared we might be making the same dumb mistakes/I want you/and your same dumb mistakes I want/your same dumb mistakes I want."

Love it.

Four stars.

Are you kidding me?

You would think, wouldn't you, in this day and age, that if a guy walks into work with a pink business shirt on it wouldn't be such a big thing?

I went to a function surrounded by State politicans, industry representatives and the Deputy Prime Minister of Australia this morning. No one made any comments about the fact that I was wearing a pink shirt.

I get to work and my editorial colleagues say nothing.

I walk past the sales area and nothing is said.

And then I walk out the back into the - you guessed it - distribution area and Dumb and Dumber are out there.

D1: What's with the pink shirt?

D2: What pink shirt?

D1: Look at Dave.

D2: Wohoo!! Dave! What's going on here hey, who've you been hanging out with on the weekends that's making you want to wear pink?

Me: Jesus guys, I really thought we'd moved on a bit from those sort of comments in the last decade or so. Apparently not.

I walked out of the office, turned around and said: Sorry, guys my mistake. I must have given you two a bit more credit than you deserved. I won't make that sort of assumption again.

I don't think they got it.

Just so you know

I had an awesome weekend.
Caught up with some old friends, made some new ones, had a big night on Saturday followed by a lazy Sunday.
What more could you want?

I have something to confess

I'm in love. Completely and overwhelmingly. Have been since I was 15. With Jennifer Love-Hewitt.

Stop it! Stop laughing! Stop groaning and rolling your eyes!

Seriously though, ever since I saw her Oscar-worthy performance in I Still Know What You Did Last Summer, my life has never quite been the same.

Now, I'm not normally one to go for the waif look. I am not a fan of scrawny girls. At all.

But for Jennifer, I'm happy to make an exception. As far as I'm concerned she fits (just) inside the healthy weight category.

And this week comes the news that young Jennifer has been voted TV's sexiest woman.

Good to see the rest of the world agrees.

But... what do you want me to do about it?

In most jobs, if people aren't getting the required job done, there's a process. Usually that involves counselling, followed by workshopping and a whole bunch of other workplace cliches.

At our paper, we are having a few distribution problems.
Heck, that's nothing new. Anyone who has ever worked at any paper can talk to you about distribution problems.

But I have come to realise our problem lies within.
You see, we are one of the only papers in the company to have our own distribution manager. Its a pretty large area so I'm sure that's what the job requires.
But this person has been in the same role all their life. Literally. They are in their 30s and they have never. held. another. job.
Let me repeat that again. In their 30s, never held another job.

I don't know what you think about that, but for me, that's just not healthy.
But it's frustrating because in today's litigious world most bosses are too frightened to fire anyone - even if they do deserve it.

Which led me to my next thought - what are this person's (workplace cliche alert) key performance indicators? Surely if the papers aren't getting delivered properly, they're not doing their job properly.
Simple, yes?

Apparently not.