I like Tom Cruise again.

And believe me, that is not a statement I would make lightly.

The man who went from heartthrob to headache has redeemed himself - completely - in Ben Stiller's latest laugh-fest Tropic Thunder.

In it, Cruise plays a mega-rich Hollywood producer in disturbing make-up. He's bald, and has the arms and chest of a particularly hirstute gorilla. Even his hands are fake.

The movie itself is brilliant. It is essentially a massive piss take of Hollywood and the film making process, as well as the mega rich actors involved in it.

But Cruise steals the show as the foul mouthed money-means-everything producer. The best part? When he, out of the blue, cranks some crappy 50 Cent-style R and B song and proceeds to dance like a white man trying to imitate a black man.

I don't want to give away anything else but go see this film. It's a great laugh and Cruise's ability to completely take the piss out of himself - and I do mean completely - has made me believe that the man is human after all.
By far one of the best comedies I've seen in years.

There's even a little part of me that wants to do a donkey vote. Only a little part though.

I'm becoming increasingly concerned as the State election draws closer.
There's two weeks to go now.
The West, as to be expected, has railed against the Labor Government from the moment the election was called.

The problem I'm having is that, as the day draws closer, I'm starting to see that most of what they're saying is right.

I've always been a left-wing Labor voter. I even voted for Mark Latham, for god's sake (hey, i was young and didn't know anything about politics. That's my excuse and I'm sticking to it.)
My grandfather worked on the docks in the 1940s, so I guess you could say left wing politics have kind of always been in my blood.

But the Labor Party does not deserve to be re-elected.
And now I find myself agreeing with the West's criticisms of Carpenter and his inept and uncaring government.
I read today that Eric Ripper pulled $1.5 billion out of nowhere and pushed it through cabinet the week before the election was called. $1.5 billion! And this from a Government who caused disgracefully paid teachers to strike because there wasn't enough money. The same Government who had a god-knows-how-many-months pay dispute with police over a meagre rise to a paltry salary.
They called the election the day after the Liberal Party installed a new leader.
And now all of a sudden they're throwing millions of dollars at anything that moves.

They need to be taught a lesson, but at the same time the idea of voting for a conservative Government grates so strongly with me that I just can't bring myself to do it, regardless of how good the politicians are that make up the Liberal Party.

I live in the electorate of Fremantle. I can tell you right now there's no way I'll be voting for Jim McGinty. But the Liberal candidate hasn't even made himself known to me down there. And not only am I a Fremantle resident, but I'm the editor of the Fremantle community newspaper! Not one press release, not one flyer in the post from this faux-candidate.

So I guess I'll be voting Greens. They've been the most vocal in my electorate - I'd be willing to vote independent but again, I've heard nothing from any independent candidates.
I guess what I'm trying to say is that I'm frustrated. Frustrated that the State Labor Party, led by Alan Carpenter, have made me so disillusioned as to not vote for them. Frustrated that the only other choice of major parties is a party that traditionally and morally places money and business ahead of social welfare and compassion.

At the end of the day, at least I can take solace in the fact that John Howard is no longer our Prime Minister.

Pure TV Gold Vol I

Last night, I watched a half hour show on Channel 9 called Dog the Bounty Hunter.
This show is awesome.
It basically centres around Duane "Dog" Chapman, a bounty hunter who lives in Hawaii and goes about catching people who have missed court dates or have outstanding warrants issued against them.
He catches them, cuffs them then takes them into the cops and picks up the reward for their arrest.
Him and his 'team' of bounty hunters, that is.

Oh, did I mention it was a reality TV show?

I don't know what the legalities of it all are - they wear some kind of badge, but they're not cops.
They also have guns and handcuff people, as well as sometimes just walking into a house and grabbing their 'target'.

But apparently it's all okay, because they made a TV show about it.

Oh, and the best part about it? Once they've captured said criminal, they spend a little while with them, trying to make them see the error of their ways.

Of course, Dog himself is an ex-con - but he's since rehabilitated and now spends his life trying to do the same for others.

Check it out - if only for the massive lion's mane of a mullet this guy sports.
Channel 9, Tuesdays, 8pm.

What was said vs What was meant to be said

During a drunken Friday night.

What was said:
"I didn't mean to shut you off, it was just all about me then and I didn't realise I was upsetting you."

What was meant to be said:
"I didn't like you then and I don't like you now. Let's not pretend to be friends."



What was said:
"Wal's friendship is not a competition, I realise that now."

What was meant to be said:
"Wal's friendship is a competition. It's okay for me to say that now that I'm winning."



What was said:
"We should definitely make this a regular occurrence."

What was meant to be said:
"Don't call me, I'll call you."

No, seriously...

How's this for a TV show - grab eight drug or alcohol addicted celebrities, put them in rehab for 21 days and film the whole thing.

When I saw the ad for Celebrity Rehab with Dr Drew, I was rather excited. How trashy! Surely this would be reality TV at its best.

And I was not disappointed.
Now, before I go into it I should let you all know that this is a Foxtel show, so the only reason I got to watch it was because I was staying at my parents' house and using their pay TV.

Nonetheless, it's great television.
The celebrities are premium B grade celebrities. First cab off the ranks is Jeff Connaway, the actor who played Kenickie, one of the T Birds in Grease. There's Brigiette Nielsen, there's the lead singer from that one hit wonder rap/rock band Crazytown, there's the actress who played one of the children in the long running sitcom Family Matters and even a porn star named - wait for it - Mary Carey.
Gold.

But that's about where the trashiness stopped. The show was actually quite full on, confronting and intense.
All of the 'celebrities' arrived at the rehab centre drunk, stoned or high.
Jeff Connaway had to be helped out of his car and was in a wheelchair for the first 24 hours, which gives a pretty good indication of his level of inebriation.
He then had a seizure less than 24 hours later as he started to suffer withdrawals from the cocaine and alcohol.

Don't get me wrong, the trash factor is there in the celebrities that appear on the show. But the content and subject matter of the show is far from trashy. If you can download it, or buy the dvd, I highly recommend it.
I'll probably never get to see another episode again because I don't have Foxtel, but it was well worth it just to catch one episode.

Did I mention the porn star's name was Mary Carey...?

I have something to confess...

...I'm a bit of a softie at heart.

Don't tell anyone, it would ruin my reputation, but I don't mind a heartwarming tale of long-lasting love of an afternoon.

Sometimes I actually like to write the stories about Golden Wedding anniversaries we do with some of our community newspapers. I know, I know.

Like the one I wrote down in Rockingham this week, about a couple who first met as teenagers in Malta, where the wife was born.

She saw her future husband - an English orphan who was living nearby - and, after expressing her interest in him (late 1940s style) he swiftly turned her down by saying "I'm not interested in little girls."

Years later, she grew up and moved to Australia. When the jive scene started in the 50s, she used to go out with her sister and at on of these events met a man who turned out to be her childhood crush from Malta.

They've now been married 50 years.

But that isn't really why I wanted to blog here today. What I really wanted to point out was the picture, taken by our photographer.

There's nothing particularly eye-catching about the subject, but the framing is almost perfect. Note the position of the couch and the matching vases in proportion to the edge of the picture. But it's not just that - look at the couple gazing at each other. Then look down below the waist. They're both wearing tracksuit pants and tatty shoes.

This picture just sums it all up for me - they didn't go out of their way to get dressed up for the photo or anything like that. They didn't need to.

They have everything they need right in front of them.

Note to the "journo" whose story I just spent 15 minutes re-writing:

1. It is not okay to copy and paste an entire story from a press release. Journalism 101.

2. Especially when part of that press release is plugging someone's business.

3. Names have CAPITAL LETTERS.

4. You can't spell a politician's name "Shenton" in the title and "Shorten" in the article.

5. Go back to England. Oh, you are. How fortuitous.

Quote of the weekend

From Lindsay's leaving drinks on Friday night.
By a person who will remain nameless:

"I stan't cand."

Or the time that Matt J punched Matt C at the bike rack and then rode off on his bike?

I got the message this morning.
On Facebook, nonetheless.

"Hi guys, has anyone heard anything about our ten year reunion? 2010 is only a couple of years away and I wasn't sure whether this was planned by the school or if we did it ourselves."

Oh god.
Are we really at this stage?
Are we really planning for a ten year reunion that's still two years off?

Not that I'm too worried - but I do find the prospect of a reunion slightly sickening.
Likewise with the fact that everyone is friends with everyone else on Facebook these days.
Everyone seems to have forgotten the relationships we had in school.
On the one hand, I think that's a great thing - we're all moving up and becoming adults, which to a certain extent may mean that we can put the past behind us.
But part of me also thinks it's a little superficial.
Do you think, for example, that Daniel thought about the time Adam punched him in the face in front of a growing crowd of 13-year-olds before adding him as a Facebook friend?
Or do you think Kate thought twice about adding people like Elaine and Susan as her Facebook friends, people to whom she would not have given the time of day during our school years?

It is funny though, seeing where people are at these days.
For example, seeing a handful of the "popular" girls at school running around with children 18 months after graduation.
And seeing the guy who was one of the most homophobic men I'd ever met come out of the closet and become one of the campest guys I know.
And seeing the kids who were picked on in school becoming more successful and making more money in their adult years than their detractors.

Maybe it won't be so bad after all. Swings and roundabouts and all that....

Well it's a big, big city and it's always the same...

This is a line I hear from fellow bloggers all the time, but - I've been a slack little blogger lately.
My apologies for not updating you with the tales of the wonderful and the mundane, but I do have a few excuses.
Firstly, my new job is fairly busy. It's not often I get the chance at work to sit down and gripe about this or that. And secondly, I actually haven't had that much to bitch about. Yes, life is still going well. Sickeningly well in fact. The old me would have said that something must go wrong soon - but I no longer take that view.

If you tell yourself something's going to stuff up, nine time out of ten, it will. It's all about the positive thinking.

So, instead, let me regale you with a story about the band I saw last night. They were called The Fratellis. And the absolutely rocked my socks off.
No, really, they were that good.
And then they got to that song that everyone's waiting for. Chelsea Dagger. And bugger me if it wasn't the most fun-filled live song I've ever heard.
Before that, the crowd was loving it.
But when this came on, something changed.
All of a sudden, people were jumping around, singing along, reaching for the sky - and I was a part of it.

Stuff like that makes me happy to be alive.