Friday, 11 July 2008

10 Guidelines for Making a Superhero Movie - something the makers of Daredevil really should have looked at.

1. Don't hire Ben Affleck as the lead.

2. Don't make him blind - he just looks a little bit disabled with cloudy, crossed eyes.

3. Don't hire Jennifer Garner as the female lead.

4. Don't throw in a weird, almost matrix-like fight scene as a 'romantic' interaction between the two main characters.

5. Don't hire Ben Affleck as the lead.

6. Don't put a piss poor background story about the superhero's dad - who was a loser, but a good guy at heart - getting killed by an underworld kingpin.

7. Don't insert a sickening Hollywood sex scene between Affleck and Garner. No, really, please don't.

8. Don't insert a Catholic priest with an Irish accent. It's just too convenient.

9. Don't use Evanescence on the soundtrack.

10. Don't hire Ben Affleck as the lead.
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7 comments:

  1. shiny11 July 2008 at 5:52 pm

    I think not hiring Ben Affleck features pretty prominently on the 10 Things Not to do When Making a Good Movie. Full stop.

    ReplyDelete
  2. Dave12 July 2008 at 5:47 pm

    You don't like Ben Affleck? Who the h-ll's Ben Affleck anyway? - Dave

    ReplyDelete
  3. Dave13 July 2008 at 9:38 am

    It's not a bad thing that you don't know who he is dave. Google him if you feel the need.

    ReplyDelete
  4. my name is kate14 July 2008 at 10:06 am

    Daredevil IS indeed unspeakably bad.

    ReplyDelete
  5. Anonymous14 July 2008 at 1:02 pm

    I agree - possibly the lamest superhero movie ever made.

    Ros

    ReplyDelete
  6. Jessica17 July 2008 at 11:17 am

    Any movie with a skin tight red leather outfit can't be all bad! :)

    ReplyDelete
  7. Anonymous20 July 2008 at 9:25 am

    Well common Dave, it's still Hollywood [American] Superhero Movies, you can't expect anything of substance from them really...

    ReplyDelete